Rescue The Maven—Please

I posted my first entry in this blog more than seven years ago. It was entitled “The Marriage Amendment—WWJD” and was one of two entries I wrote trying to convince people to vote against the so-called marriage amendment to the Virginia Constitution. Why did this citizen of the 20^th Century suddenly decide to start writing a blog? Well, frankly, I was kind of frustrated by the fact that the Richmond Times-Dispatch never published any of my letters to the editor. One day in October 2006, I shouted, “Who needs the stinking Times-Dispatch; I will self-publish.” And, as they say, the rest is history.

I have never worried too much about who is reading James River Maven. I always write to an imaginary trusted loyal reader. Sometimes I even address the reader as the only one who is reading the blog. All was well; I was happy; and then…

This week, while using a search engine to find one of my posts, I found a page from "URLmetrics" rankng my blog. It said that James River Maven was the 3,744,686 ranked website in the United States. Let me say this another way—there are 3,744,685 websites in the country ranked higher than mine. I seem to be trending, but in the wrong direction. What a revolting development this is!

Now, I have to admit that I have no idea what the URL ranking means. Does it mean that 3¾ million websites have better content than James River Maven? Does it mean that 3¾ million websites are better written than James River Maven? Does it mean that 3¾ million websites are more frequently read than James River Maven? I do not know. But I do know that my 3,744,686 ranking equates to James River Maven having an estimated worth of $793.06. (I sure hope that doesn’t change my tax status).

A bigger man than the maven would search his soul to try to determine what is lacking in his blog. Not me! I will use the philosophy of a well-known local politician who I heard say, not too long ago, that when a candidate loses, it is not his fault but the fault of his supporters. So, I come to the inevitable conclusion that it is your fault, loyal reader, that I am not ranked higher. It is obvious to me that you simply do not read each of my entries enough times; you do not spread my fame to your friends either by Facebook or Twitter; you have not become a follower of the maven; you have not urged your friends and acquaintances to become followers. 

Trusted reader, I must turn to you to do the right thing. Only you can save the maven from the embarrassing 3,744,686^th place. You need to read each of my posts at least 100 times. You must tell all your friends, both real and virtual, that James River Maven is the place to be. You need to become my follower and to urge others to do the same.

Who knows, if you come to my rescue, I might start trending in the right direction. I might even become a virus. And, maybe, just maybe, in the near future I may be ranked number 2,000,000.

I’m Back!

It’s been at least six weeks since this maven last spoke to you. During that time the world has changed a great deal:

1- Barak Obama was elected our next president winning a majority of the popular vote and a decisive margin in the Electoral College;

2- The Washington Redskins stopping playing over their heads;

3- The voters of the Commonwealth elected Democrats for President, for Senator, and for a majority of congressional seats for the first time since “Democrat” had an entirely different meaning in Virginia;

4- The American economy went further into free-fall with hundreds of thousands losing their jobs;

5- The James Madison Dukes and the Richmond Spiders are both in the semi-finals of a football division that actually chooses its national champion by playoffs;

6- America’s remaining financial institutions accepted hundreds of billions of dollars of taxpayer largess and did nothing with the money;

7- The Governor of Illinois, with an unpronounceable name spelled “Blagojevich,” gave an entirely new meaning to “let the free market decide”;

8- The Richmond Renegades played a hockey game in which the their opponent’s players served more penalty minutes than there are minutes in a game;

9- Dwight Jones was elected mayor of River City;

10- Hillary Clinton agreed to serve as our next Secretary of State.

And-- this maven lost his bid to serve on the Richmond School Board.

I could say that the election was close, that I only lost by 2553 votes. But let’s face it, I got thumped. I could blame all kinds of unexpected adversities that plagued my four month campaign. However, the fact is that more people voted for Andrea Graham Scott than voted for me.

Looking back at Election Day, I can say that I would have much preferred to have won. Finishing second is not something to be ashamed of, but it’s no great honor either. I really loved the campaigning and meeting with the voters. I loved the intellectual stimulation of expressing my ideas for fixing Richmond’s public schools. I loved the support I received from so many of my neighbors.

So, what’s next? I will get back to working with the kids in our public schools. They have such great need for a caring adult in their lives. I will continue working to make my neighborhood school one that my neighbors will send their kids to. I will do what I can to make sure that our new mayor and the members of the City Council and School Board give the citizens of Richmond the high-quality government to which they are entitled.

Let’s face it, dear reader; mavening can certainly be a full time job. As for politics—it was great fun, but it was just one of those things.

Lonely At The Side Of The Road

Just to let you know, I have been running a pretty bare bones campaign for the school board. Not being a long-time resident of Richmond, it has been pretty hard for me to find people who want to contribute to my campaign. So, at the beginning of the summer I purchased only 125 campaign signs (at about four bucks each). I figured I would put them only on major thoroughfares where they would get the most visibility. No need to blanket the whole district I thought.

After the manufacturer sent signs with the wrong color scheme (I guess they didn't realize that red, white and black were only patriotic colors in Nazi Germany) and then finally replaced them, I started planting my signs at strategic locations in the district. But, a not-so-funny thing started happening. As quickly as I put my signs out, they started disappearing. For those of you who live in Richmond, this might ring a little bell in your memory. Wasn’t it just two years ago, in a school-board race, in the very same Fourth District in which I am running, that there was a big sign war? Didn’t a supporter of one candidate take down all the signs of the other candidate? Didn’t the candidate losing signs set up a sting and catch the unsub red handed stealing his signs? (This is apparently not a crime in Richmond because of a strangely worded sign ordinance.)

Now I knew who was probably taking my signs. But, what was I to do about it? After the loss of about 40 signs I decided I was not winning this sign war. So, I adopted the Charleton Heston approach. I decided to stand along the major routes in my district holding up my sign and waving to the crowd. That S.O.B. will have to pry my sign from my “cold dead fingers” if he’s gonna steal one again. So, Monday evening it was the south end of the Nickel Bridge (on which the toll was just raised to $.35). On Tuesday, I stood along Forest Hill Avenue. Wednesday I was at the south end of the Huguenot Bridge (no toll at all). Thursday I took off to attend a PTA meeting and a candidates’ debate. Tonight I tried the Forest Hill exit off the Powhite Parkway.

So, what’s it like standing on the side of the road, holding up a campaign sign and trying to look friendly. At first, I felt kind of foolish. Then, when a few people started honking at me it felt better (although I am not quite sure that the honks were in support or because they thought I was an escapee from an asylum). From the practical side, I can see and be seen by a lot more potential voters than walking from house to house or up and down stairs to knock on doors. Of course, I don’t know whether or not they will actually remember me at the polls next Tuesday.

Mostly it’s lonely. I try to make eye-contact with drivers or passengers as they go by. But that gets harder as the sun goes down and it starts getting darker. I know they can still see me (or at least my sign) with their headlights on, but it’s not the same. All I see coming toward me are cars that are dark on the inside. I feel more and more alone out on the side of the road even though lots of cars are rolling by. Finally, when I’m not sure I can be seen any more I take my sign and go home.

I’ll do it again Monday and every evening rush hour between now and the election. The lonely candidate at the side of the road.

A New Chapter for the Maven

To my cyberfriends:

It is with great enthusiasm that I announce my candidacy for the Richmond School Board to fill the fourth district vacancy. I am running for the School Board because I am deeply committed to public education. I believe that we, the citizens of Richmond, are obligated to provide a first-class education to all of our children. Although we have made considerable progress in the quality of our schools over the past few years, the job is not done. I can provide the leadership to continue the journey.

Until now, I had no plans to run for public office. I just wanted to live close to my grandchildren and enjoy my retirement. However, a few years ago I became involved with Richmond Public Schools as a volunteer in the Micah Initiative. Soon after that, I started serving on the Citizen's Advisory Group for Communities in Schools at Westover Hills Elementary School. I have also been on the Board of Directors of Friends of Fourth District Schools. Although all of these "jobs" give me great satisfaction, I now need to do something that will allow me to help more than a few children at a time.

I am lucky to have received a quality public education. Had not my grandparents' and parents' generations made the commitment to provide high quality public schools for me to attend, I am sure that I would have never achieved what I have achieved in life. Now that I am a grandfather, it is time for me to start paying forward.

I know that voters are tired of candidates who make promises they cannot keep. Therefore, I promise to my neighbors only that I will always put the interests of the children first, that I will be honest, and that I will do everything I can to make Richmond Public Schools a system we can be proud of.

I base my candidacy on the following goals:

1- Restore public trust in the operation of Richmond Public Schools. The recent report by the City Auditor has greatly weakened the confidence of Richmond citizens in our school administration. Before we can accomplish anything else, it is vital that the citizens of Richmond be assured that their money is being used lawfully and efficiently. We must demand accountability from all our public servants. I believe in a zero-tolerance policy for public officials or employees who misuse the public's money.

2- Win the confidence of all parents in Richmond that their children can receive a high quality education in Richmond Public Schools. It is clear that many parents in the fourth district do not choose to send their children to Richmond Public Schools. I have spoken to my neighbors and I have heard lots of explanations for this attitude. We can do little to change the minds of those parents who have already opted out of our public schools. But we can provide an outstanding education to all those children who are in our schools now and to those who will become students in the future. I will work hard to make Fisher, Southampton and Westover Hills elementary schools, Brown and Thompson middle schools, and Huguenot High School models of excellence that will provide all the children in the fourth district top-quality educations. These schools will serve as magnets attracting parents to enroll their children.

3- Demand excellence from our students, teachers and administrators. We have made remarkable progress and most of the city's schools now meet state standards. However, this means only that the majority of our children are passing. We must create the expectation that all our children will get A's in school, not just C's. Although many of our students are performing at a level higher than passing, I am afraid that many are not. I am convinced that our children will meet the expectations that we set for them. If we only ask them to pass, they will only pass. However, if we insist that their goal is to earn an A in every course, they will perform at a much higher level. We must have tough curricula that challenge our children to achieve their best.

I have watched some of our remarkable teachers working skillfully and with dedication to help our students learn. Many of our children, who are pre-selected for failure by studies from the US Department of Education, are thriving in Richmond Public Schools. We must continue to assure that our teachers are the best available and that they maintain their excellence through meaningful continuing education. We must recognize the accomplishments of our outstanding teachers.

4- Involve the entire Richmond community. Our School Board often makes decisions in isolation. The problems facing our children are so significant, however, that we must involve everybody in the decision-making process. Before making decisions the board must consult with teachers, parents, civic groups and the academic and business communities. Further, although reasonable minds may disagree on policy, we can no longer afford for our School Board to be divided into rival factions.

I have no illusion that achieving any of these goals will be easy. These are not things that can be accomplished in the first few months or even years of any school board member's term. But as a sage said about two thousand years ago, "You are not required to complete the work, but neither are you at liberty to abstain from it."

I cannot do these things alone so I am urging you all to join me in this campaign for our children. I need the help of young and old; I need the help of you who are empty nesters and have already raised your children; I need the help of you who are young and do not yet have children; I need the help of you who are financially well off and you who are struggling financially; I need the help of African Americans, Caucasians, and Hispanics.

We must provide a world-class education for all the children of our city not because it will benefit the economic development of our city and region, which it certainly will. We must provide a world-class education for all the children of our city not because it will be cheaper to invest in them now than to bear the costs of their future failure if we don't, which is also certainly true. Rather, we must provide a world-class education for all of our children because it is the right and the just thing to do. It is our obligation to do it. Working together, we will do it.


Under the election laws of Virginia I cannot run for office as the James River Maven. Therefore, I must reveal my secret identity. I would appreciate it if one of you would tell me about the ethics of continuing to run this blog while I am a candidate or should I get elected.


To Gray--

Thank you for being my cheerleader-in-chief.


Bert Berlin

The Maven and the School Board

Well, my beloved reader Gray was not deterred by the fact that I am not as sexy as Matt Damon. So let’s get back to talking about me and the Richmond School Board. First a few myths:

1- Since the Superintendent of Schools is paid over $150 thousand per year, School Board members must be compensated at least as well.

2- Since the mayor (of course without his knowledge) and other city officials receive car allowances and other perks in addition to their salaries, board members must also get these freebies.

3- Because of their dedication and the tireless work they put in, School Board members are well respected by their fellow citizens.

Now that we’ve gotten those out of the way—

Let’s say I am particularly masochistic and decide that I do want to be on the school board. Let’s also assume that I have a neighbor who likewise loves pain and decides to run for the same seat. I have been told that it will cost over $10 thousand to run a winning campaign (for mailings to voters, ugly road signs, bumper stickers and the like). Gray, you might not realize this, but being a maven is not a paid position. To me, $10 thousand is a decent bit of change. Do you imagine that I will be able to keep my few friends if I start hitting them up for campaign contributions? Gray, spending $10 thousand to get elected to a position that only pays about $1 thousand per month seems like a poor investment.

And what happens if I win? Think of what I am giving up. Now when I meet someone and they ask what I do, I can tell them I’m the James River Maven. You should see the amazement in their eyes (or is it pain?). If I get elected, I’ll have to tell people that I am a member of the Richmond School Board. Do you honestly think that going from a maven to a school board member is a step up? Do you think it will be easy revealing my secret identity?

So why should I do it?

Maven, what about the children?

Yes, what about the children? Somebody needs to speak for the children. Even the trees have the Lorax to speak for them. But who speaks for the children of Richmond? Don’t we owe them a world-class education?

Gray, I assume that my wife will vote for me. And, although it’s not considered good manners, I will vote for myself. I don’t know whether I can count on your vote because I don’t know if you live in my district. So, I would start out an election campaign with two guaranteed votes and no money. Sounds like good odds to me. Maybe, I’ll just get me some petitions to circulate.

Me? For the School Board?

A loyal reader named Gray commented on a previous entry and ended with the following language:

James River Maven, you should consider running for School Board. And I enjoy your writing.

Gray, I am so glad that you enjoy my writing. I try hard to make it meaningful and enjoyable. Hopefully, once in a while I give you a bit of a chuckle.

But, Gray, if you like me, why would you suggest that I run for the School Board? I know lots of school board members and they are always working hard and feeling frustrated. After the events of this past week, I’m sure that there are lots of citizens of Richmond who would just like to flush the whole School Board into the James. Being a member of the School Board these days is not the best way to win friends and influence people. There is also strong division on the board. There are factions working against factions. Some members are more concerned with their own agenda than with the well being of our children.

Gray, what could the maven do to make things better on the board and in Richmond Public Schools? I couldn’t even win the Peoples Magazine “World’s Sexiest Man” contest. (They picked, of all people, Matt Damon, although I will demand a recount.) So why do the citizens of Richmond need me on the School Board?

1. I would demand accountability, not only from myself but from all other members of the board and all officers and employees of Richmond Public Schools. Working for the citizens of Richmond is a privilege, not a right, and everybody who is enjoying that privilege must meet the highest standards. We most be proactive in protecting the taxpayer’s money; we can’t just sit around waiting for the next audit.

2. I would demand excellence from all our students. We have been too tied up in meeting SOL and No Child Left Behind standards. These Commonwealth and federally imposed standards only require our students to pass. Our students must be striving for A’s, however, not just for C’s. We must subject our students to more stringent course requirements; we must abandon the idea that somehow Richmond students are incapable of excelling.

3. I would demand excellence from our teachers and administrators. Our students deserve the best. When necessary we must retrain our teachers in modern and effective teaching methods. We should recognize those teachers who are doing the best job and work with the others to bring them up to our high RPS standards.

4. I would demand that the members of the board treat each other with respect. I certainly expect that intelligent, caring people will have differences of opinion. However, the citizens of Richmond have a right to expect that their elected officials will act like adults.

So, Gray, with that kind of agenda would I do well on the School Board? Would I even be elected? Many voters expect candidates that know all the answers and will promise to fix everything. Gray, I have lived long enough to know that I don’t have all the answers. I also will not make promises that I cannot keep. The only promise I would make to the taxpayers is that I would do everything I could to make RPS a school system we can be proud of. RPS must provide all children in the city a world-class education. RPS must become such an excellent system that parents will move from the suburbs to the city to get their kids into our schools. Gray, to become a great city, Richmond must have great schools.

[Not Quite] Enough Said

Although the Braves are leaving, I assume I am stuck with the Richmond Times-Dispatch (at least for so long as the publishers can make a buck here). So I’ve been trying real hard to coexist with the TD. Some times it’s not that easy. I think the paper’s editorial policy is a bit Neanderthal, but it’s their nickel. Sometimes I’m a bit astounded by what the TD chooses to give front page attention to, while relegating to the back pages stories I consider to be of monumental importance. And then there are the times when I just sit at my kitchen table baffled.

A week or so ago, the TD used at least half of its editorial to give us all a history of the Church of England. Not that I minded. I learned that if your name was Thomas and you were appointed Archbishop of Canterbury by a king named Henry you would probably not lead a long life. I even went to the website of the Archbishop to learn about the appointment process (I had been surprised by the TD’s statement that the Prime Minister of England appoints the Archbishop. Actually, it’s not that simple. If you’re interested in the detailed appointment process, you might want to look at http://www.archbishopofcanterbury.org/854?q=appointment+process). But, what was the point of this editorial? The TD thought the fact that former Prime Minister Tony Blair might have been a closet Catholic at the time he forwarded the name of Rowan Williams to be archbishop merited the observation “History works in mysterious ways, its wonders to perform.” To which I replied at my breakfast table “?”

Today, under the title “Enough Said,” the TD editorial quoted from a post-Appomattox letter from “retired” Confederate General Robert E. Lee to Commonwealth Governor John Letcher. I’ll quote the letter here so you don’t have to switch channels.

"The duty of [the South's] citizens, then, appears to me too plain to admit doubt. All should unite in honest effort to obliterate the effects of the war and to restore the blessing of peace. They should remain, if possible, in the country, promote harmony and good feeling, qualify themselves to vote, and elect to the state and general legislatures wise and patriotic men who will devote their abilities to the interests of the country and the healing of all dissensions. I have invariably recommended this course since the cessation of hostilities, and have endeavored to practice it myself."

So, says I to myself, why exactly is this old letter being printed? What is it that the TD is trying to say to us under the title “Enough Said?” Is the TD suggesting that there are still citizens of Virginia that have not yet accepted the military decision of 1865? I certainly hope not. Are they saying that we are not promoting “harmony and good feeling?” Or, is it that we are not electing to the Congress and the General Assembly “wise and patriotic men?”

These are just a couple of examples of TD editorials that leave me wondering whether it is me or the editors that have lost the power of reason. If the TD is using its bully pulpit to tell us something, wouldn’t it be better to just let us know the lesson it is trying to teach? Is there some point to what the editorial is saying? Guys, could you help me out here?

But wait, you say. Maven, aren’t you sometimes guilty of the same baffling prose? Reader, you cut me to the quick. I spend hours writing and rewriting to make sure my preaching makes sense. I am proud of the reasonableness of my writing. And, even if there are times when my writing also baffles, I have license to do so. I am a CPM (certified public maven). And that, loyal reader, has made all the difference.