Harry Potter And The Dastardly Theme Park Rip-off

Prior to this past Christmas, the entire maven family (maven, maveness, maven-daughter, maven-son-in-law, 2 maven grandbabies) went down to Orlando Florida to enjoy the various theme parks. Our stay was to be three days, so we bought two-day Disney World passes and one day 2 park passes for Universal Studios/Islands of Adventure. We planned to go to the Magic Kingdom at Disney for the grandbabies, a second Disney park to be named later, and Universal Islands of Adventure for their new “The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.”

Our first day, at the Magic Kingdom, was marvelous despite day-time temperatures in the 40s and intermittent drizzle. Disney just has a wonderful way of dealing with children. The grandbabies were just entranced, especially by the wandering Disney characters, the classic Magic Kingdom rides and the daily parade. Most of the rides had long lines, but Disney has taken care of this by offering reservations at rides. You can go to a ride early in the day and reserve entry later in the day. The charge for this service? Zero.

The second day we spent at Universal. Universal has built two adjacent parks with separate admission charges (or a two park pass for a slightly reduced charge). All of the maven adults and at least one of the grandbabies wanted to see the new “Wizarding World of Harry Potter.” Universal had hyped it well and we most wanted to do “Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey,” which, is described by Universal:

Explore the classrooms and corridors of Hogwarts™. Then soar above the castle grounds on a groundbreaking new ride that lets you join Harry Potter™ and his friends on an unforgettably thrilling adventure.

We arrived at the ticket windows and paid an obscenely huge amount for the six of us to attend both of the Universal parks for one day. We noticed at the ticket office that they were offering an Express Pass to reduce the waiting lines at events for the ridiculously low price of $25 extra per person (An extra $150 for the six of us in the maven family). We figured it was just a come-on so we did not get Express Passes.

The weather was better than the day before (partly cloudy, temperature about 60). But the lines at Universal were mammoth. Universal is very considerate and posts the ride wait times as you enter—they ranged from 25 minutes to 120 minutes. The 120 minute wait was for the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Shortly after entering the park there was a sign saying that Harry Potter was off to the left. When we finally arrived at the end of the Potter line the wait was still posted as 120 minutes. But son-in-law maven was able to get a pass that entitled us to come back at 5:30 and get on a much shorter line. We spent much of the morning and early afternoon on 45 to 60 minute lines waiting to get onto five-minute rides. We even had to wait on line to pay inflated amounts for food at one of the parks restaurants. For those of you who have your own grandbabies, you must realize how unfriendly it is to force young children to wait on long lines to get to the event they can plainly see before them.

Well, at 5:30 we got to Potter and waited about 15 minutes to get into the area. Then came the great shock. Remaining wait time for “Harry Potter and the Forbiden Journey” was 90 minutes. Wait times at other Potter rides were from 45 to 60 minutes. Lines to get into stores were equally long. To get into the candy shop was a 30 minute wait. Line for wand shop, 45 minutes. Line to purchase butter-beer, 20 minutes. We were in this medieval-looking village adjacent to the towers of Hogwarts along with thousands of other people. The Florida sun had set and it was getting colder. The kids were upset, the adults were upset. Finally, we decided to leave Universal Islands of Adventure. We never did get inside Hogwarts.

This maven is rather upset that Universal has teamed up with Voldemort and the forces of evil. They know full well the wait-time problem in their parks, especially at their Harry Potter location. They advertise quite openly that "The Wizarding World of Harry Potter" is included with park admission. Yet they must be aware that to actually taste the glory of their new theme area requires someone to wait on lines for upwards of 5 hours, and to abandon the hope of frequenting any of the other areas in the theme park that you have paid hundreds of dollars to see. The mere fact that they sell Expresses Passes, so that one can wait on much shorter lines at each ride, indicates their knowledge of the problem. What they fail to advertise is that if you don’t buy the Express Pass for an additional $25 per person, you will spend most of your stay at Universal waiting on line.

The next day we spent at Disney’s Animal Kingdom. We had a great time with relatively short waits. I am thinking that Animal Kingdom might be the best bargain at Disney.

So what are we to make of this, precious reader? Both Disney and Universal are in business to make money. However, Disney seems much more concerned that its customers actually enjoy themselves at their Florida theme parks. Universal puts profits ahead of everything. Even the rides that you eventually get on exit into stores, where overly priced goods beckon to your buy-me, give-me, take-me kids. But the one thing that leads me to conclude that Universal is a rip-off is the impossibly long lines at the Potter rides and the marketing of Express passes to avoid those lines. If you decide to go to Central Florida, beware of the dark side of Universal!